mental health

SELF – not selfie- LOVE

This past Valentines Day I was encouraged to write about LOVE. I’ve always battled with self-love, as I think many of us do. I am so unbelievably hard on myself and always feel I should be doing more- giving more, learning more, experiencing more, more more more. After being diagnosed with breast cancer less than a year ago and experiencing a lot of stress while undergoing a lot of difficult things, I wasn’t sure how much “more” I could handle.

Turns out…a whole lot. I am strong, I am brave, and I am here.

Thank you for being here with me. And I hope this little thing I wrote- which I am now taking applications for (my musician friends I am talking to you bc I think it could be killer lyrics in today’s youth market) – helps you love your self a little bit more this evening.

Love ME

by Melissa Rutigliano

Drowning in doubt

Mourning in misery

I am learning how to love someone…

Me.

The scars are visible

The cuts still bleed

Yet only one person sees the ugly…

Me.

Guilty for what I eat

Treading water, sleep retreats

I need someone to feed….

Me.

Spending too much time

comparing others to me –

Prettier

Smarter

Cancer-free.

In sickness and in health

The past? Has been. The future? To be.

Someone will always be present…

Me.

I should do more

Push harder

Slow down.

Sinking deeper.

I can throw a life vest to someone…

Me.

Overcoming and changing

Holding on and letting go

I am trying better to know…

Me.

I tell myself I’m enough

I remind myself –

breathe

I am OK

Not being OK

I am learning to love…

Me.

Finding a friend within

Discovering a person I can believe

Someone here is different…

Me.

A thinker

A survivor

A swimmer

A shark

Leaving messy marks

Making beautiful mistakes

Give and take

I am becoming proud to be…

Me.

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